Infant Potty Training
© copyright 2000 - 2008

Have you ever thought about how babies were toilet trained in the days before diapers? Or how they are potty trained today in places without diapers? There is a growing community of mothers who are using infant potty training (IPT) with their babies, a method similar to the way mothers around the world have been handling the elimination issue for centuries.

With IPT, it is possible to work with *infants* as well as toddlers towards accomplishing what is commonly known as "potty training". The ideal time to start is between birth and the start of mobility (around 6 months of age). But you can also start with an older baby by gearing some of the tactics towards a mobile child.

There is no English term to suitably describe “infant potty training" as a whole, since (a) an infant cannot sit on a potty and (b) the process is more akin to teamwork (with your baby) and interconnectedness than actual training. In other words, IPT is really about communication and responsiveness. It has little to do with what we normally call “training.” Communication is the key to connecting with your baby about elimination.

Perhaps the most unique characteristic of this method is that parents typically begin working with a baby before she can even sit. Instead of beginning research on toilet training around the time a child takes her first steps, parents need to consider this method during pregnancy or the first weeks/months after delivery.

I refer to this method as "infant pottying" and "infant potty training." Other terms include "elimination communication" or "EC" and "trickle treat" (the title of my first book on this topic, now out of print). This web page will tell you all the basics, and if you want to know more or need encouragement, these are my two books and DVD on the topic: 


Philosophy

Babies are smarter than we think! The big mistake that people make is to presume that a newborn baby is unaware of going to the toilet. We assume an infant is incapable of toilet learning since infants are small and uncoordinated and also because they cannot walk or talk. An infant is helpless in so many ways that it is hard for Westerners to imagine such a tiny being could be aware of peeing and pooping. It is even harder for us to believe that an infant has some control over elimination. With these preconceived and narrow views, we encourage and teach our babies to be unconcerned about wetting and soiling diapers. In short, we teach our infants to use diapers as a toilet.

A normal, healthy infant is indeed aware of the bodily function of elimination and can learn to respond to it from infancy. By using diapers, we condition and thereby train baby to go in them. Later the child must unlearn this training. This can be confusing and a traumatic experience for the child.

An infant does his best to communicate his awareness to you, but if you don't listen, he will stop communicating and gradually lose touch with the elimination functions. He will be conditioned not to care and learn that you want him to use his diaper as a toilet.

Not only is toilet training from infancy basically unheard of by many, but it also strikes some as inconvenient. With relatively few exceptions, however, toilet training is by definition inconvenient no matter when or how you do it. If you wait for your baby to self-train at 2, 3, 4 or older, you are subjected to years of diaper changes and clean-up as well as diaper struggles.

Diapers, especially disposable ones, are a temporary way to deal with toileting. We attempt to "plug up" our child's disposal system with diapers in the same way as we temporarily stop the flow from a leaking pipe. How many parents have pondered whether or not this is the most hygienic solution for the child? How many parents care about the effects of diapers on the environment? How many would care if they knew of an alternative to full-time diapers?

Who Can Use This Method?

Parents, parents-to-be, grandparents, nannies and anyone else interested in lovingly and patiently working with a child towards accomplishing potty learning in a gentle and fun way. Infant pottying is best used by:

What Does It Take?

Time, diligence and patience. If you cannot devote these qualities or arrange for any assistance you may need, this is not the method for you or your baby. But if this method makes sense, if it resonates, go for it! It can’t hurt to try, and if it doesn’t work out, you can go back to full-time diapering.

When Do I Start?

The ideal time to start is between birth and around 6 months of age. During this time, there is a sensitive period where there is a window of learning open, and babies can easily focus on EC.

For parents who cannot start in infancy, there is information for late-starters below.

How Long Does It Take?

The average age of completion in the West is around 2 years, although babies have fairly good control of elimination for *many* months before completion.

Is It Safe?

Of course, as long as parents have the right mind-set. Parents must be relaxed and positive about working with their babies. Parents must exercise patience and gentleness; observe and respond to baby's signals on time whenever reasonably possible; and provide proper and loving support while holding their infants. This is a non-punitive method. Punishment, anger and control are NOT a part of this method. Note that this method is different from the harsh "early toilet training" method used in Western countries until the 1950s.

Does It Really Work?

Yes, but not without some effort. Success does not just happen on its own. It takes at least one committed adult and several months of perseverance to complete infant pottying. Right from the very start, there are fun and exciting daily rewards for both baby and caregiver. Baby's communication is acknowledged and encouraged. Parents are amazed at the degree of their infant's awareness and are thrilled when he signals and responds so easily and naturally.

Does My Baby Have To Be Naked?

This is not a requirement. Many parents keep a diaper or training pants on their baby in between potty visits, while others prefer to leave their baby bare-bottomed or naked most of the time. In short, it is a matter of preference.

A Wonderful Discovery (My Experience with IPT)

My first two children experienced conventional potty training. When my third son was born, I dreaded the thought of another bout of conventional toilet training which would entail additional years of diapers and began seeking a better means to accomplish this task.

I learned the basis for an alternative technique through a lady visiting us from India. She was horrified when I told her the way Westerners handle the "waste disposal issue" and explained to me the way things are done "back home" in her culture. I was skeptical when she told me that there is no need to use "the cloths" on an infant unless it is "ill of the stomach," feverish or wets the bed most nights. I had been to India several times and had noticed families peeing and pooping their babies around the countryside, but had not paid close attention. Like many others, I mistakenly assumed that Westerners could not use this technique.

I begged my new friend to tell me more and to teach me how to hold my son and get him to "go" for me, which she gladly and effortlessly did. 

I was spellbound watching her communicate with my tiny 3-month-old son, who somehow instinctively knew what she wanted him to do. I can only describe the exchange and instant understanding between them--a stranger and an infant--as a wonderful discovery.

I used the technique she demonstrated, slightly modifying and adapting it to a Western lifestyle, and found it to be far superior to conventional diaper-to-potty-training. From the day I started working with my 3-month-old son, he rarely needed a diaper, day or night. He stayed dry during most of the day at age 18 months and was finished with all aspects of potty training at age 25 months.

Outlook and Source

EC begins with association and can be approached in a rational and scientific manner as well as an intuitive and spiritual one, or a combination of both depending on what works best for you and your baby.

Remember, it is teamwork, something you do together via close and trusting communication. It is not something you are doing to your baby, and it is not something your baby can do without you. If you are willing and able, and if your baby is healthy, your baby is ready for you.

Infant pottying is based on an elimination training technique used in much of Asia and rural Sub-Saharan Africa. The method has been adapted to the Western lifestyle in various ways, including the use of a sink, potty, toilet or other container; variations in elimination positions; part-time use of the technique; and, where desired, part-time use of diapers.

Synopsis of the Method

1. Observation - Lay your undiapered baby in a comfortable, warm and safe place, then observe her:

a) timing (how long and how frequently she goes after waking or feeding)
b) body language (such as twisting or grimacing while defecating)
c) sounds (such as grunting while defecating)

This can also be done using a sling. In fact, babywearing is one of the best ways to become familiar with your baby's elimination timing and patterns since you know straightaway when she goes. It is especially beneficial in cold climates or rooms without sufficient heating. Some mothers keep their babies naked in the sling, carrying them skin-to-skin, which keeps baby at a perfect body temperature. If so desired, you can keep a cloth diaper under her while in the sling. It is, of course, not a requirement to keep your baby naked in the sling. Even if she is wearing some clothing and/or a cloth dipe without a waterproof cover, you will know when she goes.

2. Anticipation or Intuition

Anticipate when your infant needs to go, then at that moment, make a watery sound such as "sssss." Alternatively, if your baby starts to go while you are observing her, immediately make the "sssss" sound. Within a few days, your baby will associate this sound with elimination.

3. Position & Toilet Place

When you think your infant needs to go, hold her gently and securely over your preferred toilet place while giving an audible signal ("sssss" or whatever sound/words you prefer). Your baby will soon associate the sound, position and place with elimination. Use whatever location and receptacle are most comfy and convenient. Examples include the bathroom sink, a mixing bowl, a basin and the outdoors. Older babies can sit between your legs on the toilet.

4. Baby-Mother Communication

From now on, pay close attention to baby's timing and signals. When you think she needs to go, hold her in position and give your signal. If it is near time to go, infants are able to relax those muscles upon receiving your cues.

How Do I Know When My Baby Needs to Go?

You can know when baby needs to go by one or more of the following:

How Do I Dress My Baby for Best Results?

There are two main considerations that come into play and that need to be balanced.

The ideal situation (not always possible or desirable) is for baby to remain naked or bare-bottomed. If this is not an option:

There are many different ways to dress your baby for easy access. Be creative and adapt to your situation and to baby’s different phases of development. Many mothers prefer to sew their own baby clothing. Aside from using diapers as a backup, here are some other suggestions:

Benefits of Infant Potty Training

The three big winners are baby, parent(s) and the environment. Here is a more complete list of the benefits of infant potty training.

If you would like even more reasons/benefits, click here to read the "101 Reasons" list

What Do Medical Experts Think?

Although infant potty training is not well known in the West, there is a growing number of doctors and pediatricians who are supportive. Many of these have either traveled abroad and witnessed the method firsthand or else are (spouses of) immigrants who grew up in cultures where this method is commonplace. Some medical experts have used this method with their own babies.

Like so many other things in life, theories and opinions on when to start toilet learning have gone back and forth over the years. Until the 1950s, most Western families started relatively young, anywhere from 3-10 months, and finished relatively young. Then came the disposable diaper industry, more hectic lifestyles, and a new theory that it is better to delay and let baby self-train when ready.

The tide is beginning to turn again, with new European research (August 2000) concluding that the current Western views on bladder and bowel control are flawed and that it is often better to start earlier than to delay. Despite varying Western medical opinions and psychological theories, infant toilet learning has been the mainstream method used by billions of happy and well-adjusted babies in many societies for centuries. No one can deny this fact.  For a list of medical articles and supportive pediatricians, doctors and psychologists, click here (http://www.evassist.it/aitt) for the AITT Board site.

What About Babies 6 Months and Older - Is It Too Late?

Many parents have started at 6, 9, even 12 months and have done okay by making some modifications. It is usually harder to start with a mobile baby who has been "trained" to go in a diaper or who wears disposables and does not associate the feeling of wetness with elimination. It mainly depends on your convictions. If this method resonates, if you feel it is right for you and your baby, and if your healthy baby takes to it, it is certainly worth an honest try! As long as there are no major upsets in your family life or health, you are likely to be open and receptive to your baby’s elimination communication.

Another factor to consider is that there is not a fixed cutoff age at which all babies lose their connection with the elimination functions. Each child is unique and develops in his own manner. There are parents who have learned about IPT or who have started other methods of toilet learning when their babies were 6-18 months, 2 years or even older, and who have been delighted to find that their little ones were ready, receptive and communicative about toileting at these ages. In short, the window of learning seems to remain open or accessible for some older babies. No matter what age your baby is when you first learn about IPT, I usually recommend that parents give this gentle and nurturing method a try for a few weeks, then assess whether you want to continue. 

Click here to read my more detailed articles and tips on working with babies over 6 months old.

Terminology

Different expressions are used to describe this method, and you will encounter these as you travel around the internet. Here is a list of some of the more common ones:

If you have any questions please contact me.  You will have to put this email in the address line of your message.

Links

IPT Links (on the topic of infant potty training)

General Parenting Links

Click here for the book "Infant Potty Training"
Click here for the book "Infant Potty Basics"
Click here for the DVD "Potty Whispering"

Read this article in these languages:
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© copyright 2000 - 2008

Material from this article may not be reproduced without written permission.

DISCLAIMER: The information on this site is of a general nature and is designed for educational purposes only. It should be taken as peer advice and is in no way intended to be a substitute for medical advice. As each parent-child relationship is unique and each child develops at his or her own individual pace, do not rely on this information if you are having any difficulties. We recommend that you visit a qualified Health Care Professional for individual and personal attention. All advice should be discussed with your doctor or pediatrician.

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